peer edit

Sonja Burke


A couple of weeks ago, all EVHS staff had a meeting discussing the possibility of graduation 2010 taking place on the Saturday before the last day of school. It would be the first time in Eastview history that graduation takes place on a Saturday instead of the Friday after the last day of school. Since the school year can't start before labor day, the calendar has been "pushed" as Hori Sensei says, and is in need of adjustments. Graduation for the class of 2010 could possibly take place on Saturday, June 5th, 2010. Seniors next year would not have to attend the last week of school unlike all underclassmen who will have to attend school until Thursday, June 10th, 2010.Many students that will be seniors next year, such as Ronnie Allen who found out about the possibility of an early graduation through a friend, would be very happy with this decision. "I think it's a great idea to get out of school a week early," says Ronnie, "All we do during the last week of school is watch movies anyway. It just seems like a waste of time, we might as well be done with school."The good news of the likeliness that this will happen is spreading throughout this year's junior class quickly. However, not many of our current seniors have heard about it. "What?! Are you kidding me?" yells Danny Vi, an angered senior who will be graduating next month. Danny called the whole idea "retarded and unfair." "This should have been done for this year's graduating class!" He states that the only thing good about the last week of school is seeing friends for a couple more days."An unbiased opinion comes from Hori Sensei, the Japanese teacher at EVHS. "I think it's be an okay idea for graduation to be on a Saturday instead of a Friday. It would be more convenient for family members to come to graduation on a Saturday. In Japan, graduations are always on Saturdays, so I'm used to the idea."

Where can i start, um the frist sentence caught me off guard and made me amazed. On the other hand some parts lost me. Overall she should rethink the story line and develop her idea more. It made me think a lot and jump in the middle but it lost its edge at the end.

Peer edit

Siri Ware

As the school year slows to an end students are excited to have so much free time. Most of which will be spent catching up on the sleep they lost through out the nine months school was going on. But high school students will also be catching some sun, hanging out with friends and reading. Many students returning next year will be reading books for their AP classes, but some will be reading for pure enjoyment. I spoke to Cory Patel, an Eastview junior, and he filled me in on the books he enjoys. "I would recommend The Catcher in the Rye" Cory says. He also likes The Kite Runner and Soldier X. Catcher in the Rye, by J.D. Salinger, is about a mans life and all of his experiences. The Kite Runner, by Khaled Hosseini, which has been turned into a movie, has many awards. The movie was nominated for “best young actor” and “best art direction in a contemporary film” plus much more. It also won the academy award for best picture. The book has also been listed as a best seller. The Kite Runner is a story about a boy growing up in the Afghanistan war zone. He and his best friend grow up motherless, but both have incredibly different futures ahead of them based on their father’s occupations. So as they grow up they grow apart and The Kite Runner shares the story of redemption. Another huge hit turned film was twilight. The twilight series swept not just the nations, but the worlds, teenage girls. Twilight by Stephanie Meyer is about a vampire who falls in love with an average girl. The movie came out in November 2008; the sequel will be out in November 2009.

Good job really enjoyed reading this. i cant say you should change anything. Maybe more details and stay on track with the story line.

editoral cartoon

Save the earth

Pre writing

1. What is a problem/issue that our entire student body (our school, community, country, etc.) faces today?

The cutting of the trees

2. What is your view/position on the problem or situation?

I would like to have people stop cutting down there trees.

3. What would you like to achieve with your editorial? (What is the desired result?)

I would like to inform people about whats happening everyday.

4. How will you persuade your audience to adopt your viewpoint as theirs? List at least 4
persuasive points.

1. We need the oxygen 2. there are cures to diease in the forest 3. Homes to animals 4.

5. How will you motivate your readership to action in your conclusion?

I will ask them to become a tree hugger or die

6. How will your editorial serve a public purpose?

Help save mother earth

Interview question

Questions:1. So far, almost 90% of the ancient Mayan civilization's predictions have been seen to be a reality over the course of time. Do you think that it could be a posibility that their December 21st, 2012 prediction will come true?

Yeah i actually thats a hard question to answer. One part of me doesnt wanna believe but my other logical, senseable side feel like it is possible.

2. As the mysterious date grows closer, will you start taking actions to prepare for whatever happens on that supposed catastrophical day?

No not really, to be honest if its our time to die than we cant cheat it. When and if that is true than i will pray to god and let it be.

3. What do you think will happen on December 21st?

were going to blow up and everything on the earth but a few animals will survive.

Feature

In the world of professional basketball, there reigns two dominate players competing against each other. One is a veteran who has seen it all and the other is the new kid, built like a rock. They are the soul and heart of their respected team. Most believe that without them, they wouldn’t even win a game. They also carry a level of greatness to their teams by just being there. They build confidence knowing that if anything goes south, they are there to save the day. Thousands of people pay to watch these “athletes” throw a ball through a hoop. Is that all they do? Do this “people” get paid millions yearly for nothing? Most would say there amazing or magnificent. In the following paragraphs, I will be comparing Kobe “Black Mamba” Bryant against, LeBron “The King” James. I will compare and contrast their statistic and accomplishments, to best determine who is really the “best.” In the first corner is Kobe Bryant, also known as Black Mamba. The Black Mamba is the most dangerous and feared snake in Africa. Black Mamba is also the fastest on land snake and depending on the nature of the bite, a person can die in merely 15 minutes to three hours. His nickname fits him well even LeBron James said, “No one can stop him from scoring.” While attending Lower Merion High School, the NBA (National Basketball Association) drafted him without even stepping into a college. His is included in the books with players like Kevin Garnett, Lebron James, Tracy McGrady, and Andrew Bynum who also made the amazing jump from high school straight to the pros. Coming in to the league Kobe did the unthinkable. After only four years, he won three consecutive NBA national championships. The last time this was done was when Bill Russell or Michael Jordan was in the game. At his peak, Kobe was averaging over 35 points a game, but he wasn’t winning. He requested to be traded, but they built around him knowing the talent they had on their hands. The following year he single handed brought his team to the playoff and NBA finals, but as tradition serves they lose to the Boston Celtics. This year Mr. Bryant is back to the finals but what will be the outcome? Many players believe that Mamba will get his ring again. Interviews going around the lockers room and people are saying who can really stop “the lethal snake.” He will be facing Dwight Howard in the finals, Dwight also said “During the Olympic game all we had to do was just pass it to Kobe.

News Paper header

Eastview High School Basketball After a hard long season of basketball, win or, lose does training end?It does for the average player, that plays winter and starts summer break. Every year make their way up and leave so there is room for the improved elite. What you do over the summer is vital and can either give you a seat on the bench or a seat the stands. Of course, like in any sport there is favoritism in the try outs but if your good enough you will make it. After the season the most common thing to do is do track so you can stay in shape. I always like to jump during track because the higher you can jump the better. This year I quite track to join my Aau team. Aau is another big thing to keep your body in shape and game in the right mode. Aau is spring/summer time basketball for those who play year round.

interviewing notes

Where to Begin?

Choose 3 interviewees

Schedule interviews (24+ hours)

Give a "heads up" to the interviewees

Conduct background research

Write interview questions



Why do we prepare before Question?

its Ur job

1st impression

nervous, unexpected circumstance

higher quality question

preparation is a guide not a limitation



HOLY TRINITY OF INTERVIEWING

Anecdote: a brief story told by interviewee, usually paraphrased by writer, entertaining, paints a picture for reader

Revealing Quote: Said by interviewee, gives readers insight to personality

Portraiture: Description created by writer, based on observations of interviewee

Preparation Payoff: varying types for various purposes, to relax, gain trust, show interest

Types of question

1.Opener: Beginning question/remark: establish rapport.

2.First Step: Asks about the topic

3.qualifier- find out if source is qualified "what is your role in the fundraising efforts?"

4.The 5 W's

5.Numerical: statistical information

6.G.O.S.S.E.Y: goals obstacles solutions start evaluation why

7. Responder: clarification ("Would you explain what you mean? I'm not sure I understood")

8. Soliciting a quote-

9. soliciting an anecdote- prompts a short story.

10. Imaginative- strays from the routine does your team have any superstition.

11. Grenade- difficult question "some people say your favor certain players"
- Recover from grenade

When done with an interview- Thank you, sigh document sheets and further question

Question EVHS 5/8/09

1. Who will be the new superintendent of district 196?
Jane Berenz
2. How many teachers are absent from school today? Who are they?
10 teachers
3. Who is the president of our school board? How many are on the board?
Mike Rosean
4. What date is graduation this year?
June 12
5. Who are the newest faculty members?
Mr Deyo
6. Who is the tallest person at our school?
Coach Toullllley
7. What does DECA stand for?
Association of marketing students
8. How many home football games were played this season?
4
9. Who are the student council officers?
jordan mckeen
10. Where do you find accurate spelling of a student’s name? Grade level?
Attandance Office
11. How many students have enrolled at EVHS this year?
2,130
12. Who is the head custodian?
Brain Fisher
13. Who advises the Yearbook?
Mrs. Kitcher
14. Where is the district office located? (city & street name)
chipadale road, rosemount
15. Who are the administrators (in addition to Dr. Peterson) and what are their duties?
Mr.F, Mr. P. mrs m, and mr miller
16. Who advises the chess club?
Mr Detmeter
17. Name the captain(s) of the girls’ soccer team?
Marrise Price, Sam Mehr
18. Who manages the cafeteria?
Ms Hanson
19. Who are the librarians?
O'sullivine, mskosily and lindeyen
20. How many students are taking AP tests this year?
1,156 test being taken

5/5/09

Hard news (+/- 600 words): This is how journalists refer to news of the day. It is a chronicle of current events/incidents and is the most common news style on the front page of your typical newspaper.
It starts with a summary lead. What happened? Where? When? To/by whom? Why? (The journalist's 5 W's). It must be kept brief and simple, because the purpose of the rest of the story will be to elaborate on this lead.
Keep the writing clean and uncluttered. Most important, give the readers the information they need. If the federal government announced a new major youth initiative yesterday, that's today's hard news.



W- What happened

W-When

W-Where

W-Whom

W-Why



Soft news (+/-600 words): This is a term for all the news that isn't time-sensitive. Soft news includes profiles of people, programs or organizations. As we discussed earlier, the "lead" is more literary. Most of YPP's news content is soft news.





Feature (+/-1500 words): A news feature takes one step back from the headlines. It explores an issue. News features are less time-sensitive than hard news but no less newsworthy. They can be an effective way to write about complex issues too large for the terse style of a hard news item. Street kids are a perfect example. The stories of their individual lives are full of complexities which can be reflected in a longer piece.
Features are journalism's shopping center. They're full of interesting people, ideas, color, lights, action and energy. Storytelling at its height! A good feature is about the people in your community and their struggles, victories and defeats. A feature takes a certain angle (i.e. Black youth returning to church) and explores it by interviewing the people involved and drawing conclusions from that information. The writer takes an important issue of the day and explains it to the reader through comments from people involved in the story.
Hint: Remember to "balance" your story. Present the opinions of people on both sides of an issue and let the readers make their own decision on who to believe. No personal opinions are allowed. The quotes from the people you interview make up the story. You are the narrator.


Editorial: The editorial expresses an opinion. The editorial page of the newspaper lets the writer comment on issues in the news. All editorials are personal but the topics must still be relevant to the reader.



The lead

One of the most important elements of news writing is the opening paragraph or two of the story. Journalists refer to this as the "lead," and its function is to summarize the story and/or to draw the reader in (depending on whether it is a "hard" or "soft" news story - See below for the difference between these two genres of news stories).



The body

The body of the story involves combining the opinions of the people you interview, some factual data, and a narrative which helps the story flow. A word of caution, however. In this style of writing, you are not allowed to "editorialize" (state your own opinion) in any way.


Further tips for news writing
Finding story ideas
Keep your eyes and ears open; listen to what your friends are talking about.
Read everything you can get your hands on; get story ideas from other newspapers and magazines.
Think of a youth angle to a current news story.
Research a subject that interests you ask yourself what you would like to know more about.
Talk to people in a specific field to find out what is important to them.

Notes 5/1/2009

1st Amendment- Religion, Speech, Press, Assembly, and Petition



Censorship- What authority do school officials have to control the content of high school student media?







Public vs. Private Schools- "Public schools have more freedom than private schools"







Tinker- improved the freedom in school. Physically disruptive speech not allowed.







Fraser Standard- inappropriate speech for class president.





Fredrick-In 2002, 18-year-old Joseph Frederick was suspended from the high school where he was a senior after he displayed a banner reading "BONG HiTS 4 JESUS" across the street from the school in Juneau, Alaska, during the 2002 Olympic Torch Relay

Three types of student websites-

offensive, obnoxious and insulting

Eastview News

1. What stories are covered every year?


Homecoming Issue
Valentine's Day



• What time of year did these stories run?



• Are any of the same people involved year after year?



2. What was the biggest story of each year?



3.How many personality sketches of students were run each year?



• What types of students were interviewed? (athletes, student leaders, etc.)



• Was any one student constantly featured in one year? Why?



• Do you think this was fair?



4. How many personality sketches of faculty were run each year?



• Which teachers were featured?



• Why those particular people?



5. What full page features (or center spreads) did the publication carry?



• Are any of those topics still relevant?



6. What was a great year(s) for sports teams? Activities?



• Did the school have any state champions?



• Olympic performers?• Other honors?



7. Find a story that uses background information from previous years.



8. What topics did the paper editorialize about each year?



• What stand did the paper take?



• Has the problem been solved or is it still an issue?



9. What major news did the paper carry about classes?



• Any curriculum changes?



• Any major new programs?



10. Any new equipment?



• Any building programs?



11. Any scandals involving students, administrators, or teachers?



• What happened?



12. What changes in fashion among students can be found?



13. What signs of changing times can you find as mirrored in the concerns of students?



• What concerns never seem to change and would continue to make good stories year after year?



14. Did the school have any championship academic teams?



• Art show winners?• Band or choir awards?• Science winners?



• National honors?



15. Which clubs were most active?



16. What campus events made the most news?



17. What movies and music groups has the paper reviewed?



18. What issues did cartoonists choose?



19. How has the publication’s format changed?



20. Did the demographics of your student population change? Why?



21. What are the school’s traditions and how did they develop?



• Who are the school’s traditional rivals? (Could vary between activites.)



• How did the rivalry begin?22. What are five things most interesting about EVHS?

Notes 4/28/09

Definition:
Define “Journalism” in 1-3 sentences.
-Current events that are print in the world. You can get it from paper TV or Internet.
-reporting, writing, editing, photographing, or broadcasting news or of conducting any news organization as a business.

List and describe the six criteria of newsworthiness.




TITLE DESCRIPTION EXAMPLE
1. Timeliness- swine Flu
2. Proximity - area that affects the reader
3. Significant Event- 9/11 presidential election
4. Prominence People- celebrity attraction (Brittany Spears)
5.Unusualness- octopelet mom,
6. Feel good story that gets peoples interest.




What are the advantages of print journalism?
1. not that much risk
2. Chose what you can read
3. lot more detail




What are the advantages of broadcast journalism?
1. More entertaining
2. More Current
3. Free


Why has online journalism (convergent media) become so popular?
-Best Of both worlds. Current and more details

Car that Picks you up

Car of the Future! NOW

SuperBowl Ads

Company: Game Day

Target Audience: Male around the age 14-25

What persuasive method used (humor, action, celebrity, human interest, etc.)? Humor

How were camera shots and editing used to enhance the message? Moving Screen

What is the slogan/message for the company? Live in your world. Play in ours.

Was the message effective? Why or why not? Yes, because it made me want to play the game..

_________________________________________________________________
Company:Budwiser

Target Audience: 21-50, mostly male

What persuasive method used (humor, action, celebrity, human interest, etc.)? Humor

How were camera shots and editing used to enhance the message? The face close ups

What is the slogan/message for the company? Drink Responsibly

__________________________________________________________________

Company:Chrysler

Target Audience: 25-40

What persuasive method used (humor, action, celebrity, human interest, etc.)?Action and style

How were camera shots and editing used to enhance the message? Black and white

What is the slogan/message for the company? drive and love

Was the message effective? Why or why not? Nope, didnt make me want to buy it.

___________________________________________________________________
Company: Pepsi

Target Audience: 12-40

What persuasive method used (humor, action, celebrity, human interest, etc.)? Humor

How were camera shots and editing used to enhance the message? Zooming

What is the slogan/message for the company? Drink
__________________________________________________________________
Company:Fed Ex

Target Audience: Older age

What persuasive method used (humor, action, celebrity, human interest, etc.)? Humor

How were camera shots and editing used to enhance the message? Going back and forth from him and her

What is the slogan/message for the company? Express

___________________________________________________________________

Company: Dodge

Target Audience:

What persuasive method used (humor, action, celebrity, human interest, etc.)? Action/ humor

How were camera shots and editing used to enhance the message? Moving of the camera

What is the slogan/message for the company? Hit it
____________________________________________________________________
____________________________________________________________________
Company: Gatorade

Target Audience:

What persuasive method used (humor, action, celebrity, human interest, etc.)? Human Interest Celebrity

How were camera shots and editing used to enhance the message?

What is the slogan/message for the company? Is it in you?
____________________________________________________________________

Company:ESPN

Target Audience: Sport lovers

What persuasive method used (humor, action, celebrity, human interest, etc.)? Humor

How were camera shots and editing used to enhance the message? Camera

What is the slogan/message for the company? This is sportscenter

____________________________________________________________________

Company: H&R

Target Audience: 21-40

What persuasive method used (humor, action, celebrity, human interest, etc.)? Humor

How were camera shots and editing used to enhance the message?

What is the slogan/message for the company? we will find what others miss.

_________________________________________________________________

Maxim

1. 5,000,000 (11.25 million)
2. 20% (34%)
3. 75% (80%)
4. 80,000 (63,000)
5. 98% (78%)
6. 60% (73%)
7. 35% (66%)
8. 50% (80%)
9. 190,000 (156,000)

Key:
(actual)

First Blog

Im relaxing in class and im wondering who is gonna win the finals???? boston, cavs, or Lakers????




BOSTON BABY!!!!!